That’s what happened to me yesterday. I had an appointment with a dermatologist. You know how when you get old you start growing all these warts and moles and age spots and all those really ugly things? Blech!! Anyway, I thought it was time to go have them all checked out since Lovely Daughter has been after me for several years to do this.
So like a good Mom I made the appointment, traipsed my body into his office and awaited his arrival. After the nurse did her thing – you know – played 20 questions with me and all that – she told me to disrobe and robe up again with that air-conditioned gown that’s open in the back. Now I’m pretty quick at changing – after all, how hard is it to get out of a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. This is the first time I can ever remember that the doctor has walked in on me before I was changed. There I was, standing in all my glory – well, I still had my bra and panties on (sorry if that’s TMI, Art – snicker), but hadn’t quite gotten to the backless gown yet.
The poor man was so embarrassed he started to glow, turned his back and apologized. I told him not to worry, as he couldn’t embarrass me. After all, he was going to see all the bare skin in a few minutes anyway.
This guy was an absolute gem. I found out he’s not an actual physician, but a nurse practitioner. I sure wish a lot of doctors had his bedside/tableside manner. He was so thorough and explained everything so well.
And he was so flattering. He told me he would never have believed I am as old as I am (but I’m not going to tell YOU) by looking at my skin. I’m one of those lucky ScandihOOvians – even though I’m fair skinned I’m able to soak up the sun, get a good healthy color and still don’t damage easily from the sun. He said that I’ve obviously done a good job of taking care of it. Soap and water, Folks, that’s it. But then I’ve never smoked either, so I’ve very few wrinkles. Guess I never thought much about any of this until I had this conversation with Nurse Derm.
Then we got down to business – getting rid of all those moles, warts and skin tags. OUCH!! Most of them were burned off with his little freezer gun thingie. That stung a little bit, but I’ve got a pretty high pain tolerance, so I made it through that just fine. The thing that really got me was the smell of burning skin – not a pleasant smell AT ALL.
So here I am today – minus all those Old Women Thingies, just a few scaly patches that will disappear in a few days.
So like a good Mom I made the appointment, traipsed my body into his office and awaited his arrival. After the nurse did her thing – you know – played 20 questions with me and all that – she told me to disrobe and robe up again with that air-conditioned gown that’s open in the back. Now I’m pretty quick at changing – after all, how hard is it to get out of a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. This is the first time I can ever remember that the doctor has walked in on me before I was changed. There I was, standing in all my glory – well, I still had my bra and panties on (sorry if that’s TMI, Art – snicker), but hadn’t quite gotten to the backless gown yet.
The poor man was so embarrassed he started to glow, turned his back and apologized. I told him not to worry, as he couldn’t embarrass me. After all, he was going to see all the bare skin in a few minutes anyway.
This guy was an absolute gem. I found out he’s not an actual physician, but a nurse practitioner. I sure wish a lot of doctors had his bedside/tableside manner. He was so thorough and explained everything so well.
And he was so flattering. He told me he would never have believed I am as old as I am (but I’m not going to tell YOU) by looking at my skin. I’m one of those lucky ScandihOOvians – even though I’m fair skinned I’m able to soak up the sun, get a good healthy color and still don’t damage easily from the sun. He said that I’ve obviously done a good job of taking care of it. Soap and water, Folks, that’s it. But then I’ve never smoked either, so I’ve very few wrinkles. Guess I never thought much about any of this until I had this conversation with Nurse Derm.
Then we got down to business – getting rid of all those moles, warts and skin tags. OUCH!! Most of them were burned off with his little freezer gun thingie. That stung a little bit, but I’ve got a pretty high pain tolerance, so I made it through that just fine. The thing that really got me was the smell of burning skin – not a pleasant smell AT ALL.
So here I am today – minus all those Old Women Thingies, just a few scaly patches that will disappear in a few days.
9 comments:
That's some adventure, isn't it? I went during the summer, I'm going again in December, and if I went every week, they'd still find something to take off. And yet they tell me too that my skin is great for my age, and it is, because I haven't spent much time in the sun, and frankly, I got great genes; not a lot of wrinklers in my past.
Ouch! Sounds like you earned a luke-fisk medal there, Lena!
I had that one precancerous thing freeze dried with the gun off my temple and I just about wanted to murder my little dermatologist! I'm afraid to go back for more but know I have to. My spot got more read before it finally scabbed over. But now it looks like there was never a problem there at all when it was the size of a half-dollar before.
See you tomorrow! Thanks for the maps! Now on sale at eBay! Maps to the Stars - Ole & Lena! Okay - I kid.
ive seen bras and panties before, mind you!! now i just pop those pesky warts and moles myself!! got one yesterday as a matter of fact!! now i hope that wasnt TMI for you!! heheheee!~!!
OMG, Art - that's so painful. You must be the MAN OF STEEL in disguise. Got your superman uniform hidden anywhere?
I found one of those brownish age spots on the outside part of my wrist today. Everyone told me to dab lemon juice on it. All I know is I want it gone!
I'm a day or so behind in my reading...loved your Sea Story. Imagine being able to trace your ancestry back to far. Loved the story. I wonder why they make you put those gowns on anyway when they just make you take them right back off again.
What a great entry! You just crack me up!
You are so BRAVE!! I haven't had the nerve to get all the hanging things checked out.
I want it all gone too, but don't want to travel 400 miles for it.
Great Entry!
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