There was a Hot Time in the Old Town Last Night

Last night was the big night. I got to meet Kitchen Logic face to face. She brought along her friend, Buzz and Buzz's daughter, Little Buzz. Little Buzz attends college here, (one I used to work at) so that was their excuse to drive all the way up to the Far North Land.

We had made arrangements to meet at the Watering Hole. Kitchen Logic expressed some concern about the fact that we wouldn't recognize each other - but THAT didn't happen. I spotted her the minute she walked in the door, as did Lovely Daughter. And she, in turn, recognized both of us immediately.

It was so much fun - almost as though we had known each other forever. And Buzz and her daughter look more like sisters than mother and daughter. There's definitely no mistake that they are related.

Anyway, there were a few drinks consumed, a few karaoke songs sung, and a lot of visiting that went on.

Lars, Lovely Daughter, Ole and I are quite tall people, as are Buzz and her daughter. When it came time to say goodbye and we all stood up, Kitchen Logic said she felt like she was in the land of giants. When Ole was going to give her a goodbye hug he had to squat down a bit so she could get her arms around his neck. BTW - a secret - shhhh - she wouldn't want this let out in public. In one of her blogs she said she doesn't hug. Well, that's not really true because we all got hugs before she left.

I had forgotten my camera (OLDZheimers) but fortunately she had hers and took lots of pictures. Hey, Kathy, don't forget to send me some, okay?

Anyway, we had a great time getting together and I can't wait to do it again, only next time in a quieter atmosphere where we can visit more and actually hear everything that everyone has to say. It was a bit noisy in there - you know how bars can get.

Now I have to get busy. I have to make a tuna macaroni salad for a barbecue that we're invited to tomorrow. I've got a cucumber salad waiting to be made and I've got enough ripe tomatoes to make another batch of salsa. Guess I have my work cut out for me, huh?

Love Lena

Pinched, Poked, Prodded & Fried

That’s what happened to me yesterday. I had an appointment with a dermatologist. You know how when you get old you start growing all these warts and moles and age spots and all those really ugly things? Blech!! Anyway, I thought it was time to go have them all checked out since Lovely Daughter has been after me for several years to do this.

So like a good Mom I made the appointment, traipsed my body into his office and awaited his arrival. After the nurse did her thing – you know – played 20 questions with me and all that – she told me to disrobe and robe up again with that air-conditioned gown that’s open in the back. Now I’m pretty quick at changing – after all, how hard is it to get out of a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. This is the first time I can ever remember that the doctor has walked in on me before I was changed. There I was, standing in all my glory – well, I still had my bra and panties on (sorry if that’s TMI, Art – snicker), but hadn’t quite gotten to the backless gown yet.

The poor man was so embarrassed he started to glow, turned his back and apologized. I told him not to worry, as he couldn’t embarrass me. After all, he was going to see all the bare skin in a few minutes anyway.

This guy was an absolute gem. I found out he’s not an actual physician, but a nurse practitioner. I sure wish a lot of doctors had his bedside/tableside manner. He was so thorough and explained everything so well.

And he was so flattering. He told me he would never have believed I am as old as I am (but I’m not going to tell YOU) by looking at my skin. I’m one of those lucky ScandihOOvians – even though I’m fair skinned I’m able to soak up the sun, get a good healthy color and still don’t damage easily from the sun. He said that I’ve obviously done a good job of taking care of it. Soap and water, Folks, that’s it. But then I’ve never smoked either, so I’ve very few wrinkles. Guess I never thought much about any of this until I had this conversation with Nurse Derm.

Then we got down to business – getting rid of all those moles, warts and skin tags. OUCH!! Most of them were burned off with his little freezer gun thingie. That stung a little bit, but I’ve got a pretty high pain tolerance, so I made it through that just fine. The thing that really got me was the smell of burning skin – not a pleasant smell AT ALL.
So here I am today – minus all those Old Women Thingies, just a few scaly patches that will disappear in a few days.

Once Upon a Time

Do you know the difference between a Fairy Tale and a Sea Story? You don’t? Well, grab yourself a cup of coffee, make yourself comfortable and get ready for a bit of education here.

A Fairy Tale always starts out with “Once upon a time” and ends with “And they all lived happily ever after.” A Sea Story always starts out with “Now this ain’t no shit” and ends with “And we all went out and got all drunked up.” And everything else in between is the same. Now, Ole, having been a sailor in his lifetime, and having spent thirty plus years in sales can spin yarns with the best of them. Me? I’m not quite so good at it.

A number of years ago when I was deeply engrossed in genealogy research on the Swedish side of my family I came across a very interesting entry in one of the Swedish archives. I was following my mother’s maternal family and this is what I found:

Once upon a time, back in the days when the Vikings were the scourge of the world and busy trying to take over the British Isles, there was a castle built in southwestern Sweden in the Gotland area. In this castle there was a coat of arms with a hand cut off at the wrist and dripping blood. This was in honor of an old-time Swedish minor king (my ancestor) who was in a race to northern Scotland. There were two long-boats in the race, and whoever first laid hand on the soil of that country would be the king of that area. My ancestor was losing the race by just a little bit and couldn’t seem to catch the other boat. So – he took out his sword, chopped off his left hand and threw it on shore. Thus he became king of that northern area of Scotland.

And then all the Vikings went out and got all drunked up to celebrate their victory and to kill the king’s pain!!

Supposedly this took place back in the 800s AD. That’s a long time ago, Folks, and the Vikings were known to be a pretty wild and woolly bunch, so I wouldn’t put something like this past them to accomplish their goal.

After reading through my father’s family history, I think everybody and his brother was the king of something or other. His family history has actually been traced back to the days of the Vikings, earliest entry being 850 AD. Apparently I come from a long line of bad people. For example some of the names – Eric Haroldson nicknamed Eric the Bloodaxe (sounds creepy, huh). Harold the Black, who was at one point the king of the Isle of Man and died in 1040. There was a little guy by the name of Olav Bitling, nicknamed Dwarf, died 1153. He was apparently quite a thug and chopped up a lot of folks back then. As time went on the names weren’t quite so descriptive and the people seemed to be less violent.

So – Fairy Tale or Sea Story? You pick.

Calling Dr. Ole - stat

Dr. Ole, calling Dr. Ole - stat - please come to the kitchen and change Beau's bandage.

So Dr. Ole performed another operation this morning because Beau's bandage would rather hang down around his ankle than stay where it's supposed to. I think it falls due to the weight of all the dog saliva that gets injected into it. And of course the vet's orders were to keep it dry, but then how do you do that? Rubber band his tongue or something? We've even sprayed the bandage with bitter apple, but I think he's actually learned to like the taste of that!! Beau has got to have the busiest tongue of any dog I've ever seen. He licks anything and anybody whenever he can. You don't have to worry about him biting you, he'll lick you to death first. I think I need to buy a new doormat for our house. One that says "Caution - dog can't hold his licker!"

So here's a picture of Beau sporting his new sock/bandage with a Nike emblem. Now he thinks he's a pretty cool kid and can spend the afternoon watching football with Ole out in the shop doing *man* things.

And here's a picture of Daisy getting her sympathy bandage. She's not into all the sports emblems and stuff like that. But if you gave her a Coach purse she'd probably proudly wear it around her neck and carry her things in it. She loves to carry things like tennis balls and empty cat food cans, so then she'd have a place to put them where Beau couldn't snitch them all the time.

Speaking of Beau learning to like the taste of bitter apple on his bandage I have a little story to tell you about Lovely Daughter (Hi Lovely Daughter!! She always gets so embarrassed when I tell stories about her, but after all, isn't that a parent's job? to embarrass their children? snicker)

Anyway, when Lovely Daughter was a little girl about a year or two old she developed a bad habit - eating the backs of her books. Remember all the Little Golden Books that you used to buy for your kids? Well, I think all of hers have teeth marks along the backs, in fact some of the backs are even missing. Maybe we should have given her bones to chew on during that time period of something. Anyway, we were trying to break her of this habit and Ole came up with the bright idea of putting something bitter tasting on the back edges. I don't remember what he started with, but whatever it was it didn't work. He eventually graduated up to Tabasco sauce, and she LOVED it! She just kept chewing on her books. She must have been missing some valuable vitamin or mineral at that time in her life. Now ask me if she likes Hot and Spicy now? Uh-uh - not on your life. Guess we must have burned her taste buds out or something.