Bing, Bang, Boom & Splat

I didn't miss the 4th of July - I just didn't have time to post - life was just a bit busy yesterday. I trust that you all had an enjoyable day and didn't lose any fingers or toes blowing up fireworks.

Now isn't this just the epitome of an old fashioned Independence Day celebration. I wonder if anybody has frog jumping contests anymore? One of our little local towns has turtle races, but no frog jumping contests.

When I was a kid, celebrating the 4th of July was a big deal. We'd have tons of fireworks that we would work on all day long and then at night there would be many neighborhood displays. Do you remember those little cracker ball thingies that you would throw at cement and they would pop? How about snakes and zingers, and all those kid things that were so fun. And sparklers - how we would wait for twilight so Dad could light the sparklers and we could make all kinds of spectacular designs.

Today, in the state of Minnesota, it's against the law to buy or set off any kind of fireworks with the exception of what is called ground based fireworks of 75 grams or less (that's pretty small). Anything that goes up in the air is illegal. So in our little town last night, there were a lot of law breakers. There were a number of neighborhoods that spent several hours exploding beautiful things high up in the air. You could also see displays throughout the countryside where people were celebrating by blowing things up. I often wonder what it would be like to be flying in a plane and looking down on the 4th of July night.

Ole also participated in making loud noises last night. Several years ago he built a black powder cannon and loves to outdo everyone else with the big boom that he can make. He announced our arrival at Bob & Carol's house last night by blowing the cannon and rattling the neighborhood windows. Everyone was in the backyard and I was told jumped out of their skins when the cannon shot. Of course, that's just what Ole's looking for so he got his chuckles last night. Oh, and don't worry - he doesn't use cannonballs when he shoots it - he wads up kleenx and just blows shreds all over (snicker).

When I was a kid we always used to travel to my Uncle Emil's who had a dairy farm in central North Dakota. This was always the best because I got to spend several days with my favorite cousin, Jean. She was a year older than me and we were just like sisters. Celebrating the 4th of July there was always a really big deal. The celebration lasted for a couple of days. It always started with a pancake feed and lots of visiting around with the town's folk and the people who had come back to celebrate. There was a big parade in which Uncle Emil always rode his horse, all decked out in a beautiful saddle and red, white and blue ribbons. The horse was a gorgeous Palamino and was extremely well trained to do tricks. Then there was a big family picnic in the park and horseshoe tournaments. And a big rodeo in the afternoon - this was cowboy country, you know. The evening encompassed a musical play on stage out at the ball park and ended with a spectacular display of fireworks put on by the City. Somewhere around midnight our parents would pile us in the car where we would fall asleep in the backseat before they could drive us the two miles home and toss us into bed.

Cousin Jean and me

So belated happy 4th - I've got places to go and things to do.

Later, People.

Garden Tour 2008

Good thing the weeds don't show in these pictures!!

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

And in the Words of Forrest Gump -

Well, here it is Monday – the weekend is over – and I bet you’re all just dying to hear about Jane’s big surprise party for Dick, heh?

Ole and I didn’t arrive until about 6:30; visited with various folks for a while, put the steaks that WE brought on the grille and ate from all the dishes that were “brought to share.” Mmmm, there was some good stuff there. Potlucks are wonderful in that way, aren’t they? You get to taste everything. Anyway, there was a lot of food there and if anyone went home hungry it was their own fault.

About 8:30 the sex toy lady started hauling her suitcases full of stuff in and setting up her display. There were more colors and glow in the dark dildos than I could have ever imagined. There was stuff on that display table that I had no idea what it was used for – but then that could be my Norwegian Lutheran upbringing too, ya’ know. Kept in the dark all my life, that’s me.

The Fun Bus arrived promptly at 9 p.m. and all the guys that “were allowed” to go got on the bus. Dick was kind of hanging back, I’m not sure why. In fact I heard him say to another guy, “Do I have to go?” Anyway, the bus was full when it left Dick’s house, with the promise that they would be back in an hour or so. Bwahaha! What a joke.

Bob & Carol, Ole & I left shortly after that, stopped at Krabby’s for a drink, got blasted out by the music and were home by 10:30 – such party animals we are.

Bob said he saw Dick the next day (Sunday afternoon) and he was still in the bag with slits for eyes. Dick said Jane was still in bed after having been up all night. So I have no racy stories to tell about the happenings because we chose not to hang around and witness all the garbage. Besides, I have a difficult time being in the same room with Jane anymore and find it’s much better for my peace of mind to vacate the premises when she’s around. The only reason we went at all is because of Dick.

But tonight is half-price burger night at the Watering Hole, so I’m sure we’ll hear some stories tonight and I’ll fill you in.

Now, here is my philosophy. If you don’t want to hear it, just click the little red “X” in the upper right hand corner.

I am not a tea-totaler by any means. I do my share of consuming and I’m certainly not against anyone having a good time. Where I do have a problem is when someone gets so trashed they’re still in the bag the next day. Life is too short to waste the entire next day recuperating from the night before. Most generally the only thing you do when you’re in that condition is make an ass out of yourself, anyway.

So in the words of Forrest Gump, “And that’s all I have to say about that.”